Do you want juice with that haircut?

Matthew had his first haircut the day after Christmas last year. He wasn't too happy about it - David's grandfather was a barber for years so we asked him to do it. Maybe I should add that David's grandfather celebrated his 92nd birthday the same day he gave Matthew his haircut. He also gave David his first haircut, so I thought it would be sweet. After the first haircut, I took Matthew to my "old" stylist from "back home" a couple of times, but he was always disagreeable. Sometime when we didn't have a trip planned, David was going to the barbershop and I asked him to take Matthew. So the two of them went together. David said Matthew was perfect! He watched his daddy get his hair cut and then sat nice & still in the chair for his own cut. David said even the buzzing near his ears didn't bother Matthew! I figured if he's that well behaved, then they can always go for haircuts together...so they do!

This morning the fellas went off for haircuts, and were going to make a quick grocery run since we've been out of town for a while & our cupboards are bare. I heard someone at the door long before I expected them to return, and it was David. He was stopping by to get a sippy cup. Apparently every time they go for a haircut, they visit the store next door for a juice box. Today, Matthew remembered & asked for juice when they left the barbershop. They were out of juice boxes & David said he wasn't doing too well with the bottle, so he decided to come home for a cup.

Maybe if I was bribing with juice Matthew would be more cooperative when I take him, but I think it's a great boy's day out to have haircuts & juice, so I think I'll leave this one to daddy.

Merry Christmas!

Yeah, I've gone missing. We went south for the holidays, spending a few nights in Tennessee and a few in Georgia. We'll be home by New Year's, and I'll update more then. I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas!

A shitty day!

Sorry to make so many posts today - I figured with all the pictures it was better to split the ones about the weekend. After a good weekend I couldn't be having a shittier day. I just lost my job. Technically I'm a contract worker so I don't really have a job, but I only work for one company (it's the company I worked for before we moved to Michigan) and they decided they need to put the contract on hold. I am sure it is easier for them to do that than to let someone who is a full time employee go, but it sucks for me!

They want to put it on hold for 3-4 months, but what am I supposed to do in the meantime? Pick my nose & scratch my ass?

David & I have always been pretty responsible, so I think financially we should be okay for a bit, but I am afraid to sit around & wait on them to get their shit together & call me back.

I also love our daycare situation and don't want to change that unless absolutey necessary, so that means trying to find something part time Tues-Thurs. The economy & job market here suck, so I really dread trying to find something.


AAAAAGGHGGHHHHH! What am I going to do?

Happy 2nd Birthday!

After Matthew's nap we celebrated his birthday with cake & presents. He seemed really into the whole birthday thing, so it was a lot of fun. I think he blew out his candles 5 times! After we put him to bed, we heard him singing "Happy Birthday" to himself.

Here are some more pictures of his birthday celebration:





MIL complimented us on what a good baby Scarlett is - she said she has never seen a better baby As stressed out as I get when I have to spend time with MIL, this weekend was a pleasant surprise! There were absolutely no tense moments - she basically got to enjoy her grandchildren & I was able to get things done around the house. (and oh yeah, she folded a TON of laundry while they both slept!)

There were a few things I wanted to do that I did NOT get done, mainly finishing up the Christmas shopping and cleaning out our bedroom. Right now my dresser is still full of spring/summer & maternity clothes, and my winter clothes are piled up in rubbermaid containers in front of the dresser! It's a mess...maybe I'll get it straight soon though!

sledding

We also got about 10" of snow over the weekend, so yesterday morning David & I took Matthew sledding. (David had scheduled a vacation day since his mom was here.) Matthew seemed to enjoy it, and he liked making & throwing snowballs! I think his favorite thing was rolling down the hill though! I tried to get him back on the sled but he just wanted to roll. I didn't mind, since I was tired from pulling him & the sled up the hill! David & I took turns, but since David usually takes better pictures I wanted him at the bottom taking pics! It was hard to get a good one on the hill since Matthew kept spinning in the sled.

cinnamon rolls

Sunday I spent cooking! I made cinnamon rolls. I swear it took all day between taking breaks to feed Scarlett! They turned out great though. I also made Matthew's birthday cake. Oh yeah, I got another early Christmas present....a kitchenaid mixer! David gave it to me early thinking it would help with the baking! And yes it did! I LOVE it!

So it's been a GREAT Christmas already!

Anyway, here are some pictures of the cinnamon rolls:


IN PROGRESS:


READY TO ROLL:



FINISHED PRODUCT (I ended up with 8 of these pans!):


CLOSE UP:

GREAT weekend

Friday I cleaned like a madman to get the house in shape for MIL to visit. She got in late (her flight was changed & she didn't get in until after midnight) and then we stayed up a while chatting - she told us she brought us our Christmas present early. It was a DSLR camera. She told us that she didn't know much about them & that the store charges a restocking fee if the box is opened so we should research it before we open the box. We spent Saturday morning researching, but finally just got anxious to "play" with our new toy so we opened it.

The camera is AWESOME! My big complaint about our "old" camera (that we just bought in July) was the delay between pressing the button & the picture actually being snapped - now we have no delay! It also takes much better pictures! Here's one of the first pics with the new camera:

So yeah, I complain about MIL but she is great about gifts! I really appreciate the camera because I have been wanting to take a photography class but anything above basic (showing you how to email pics, how to get them off the camera onto the pc, how to organize the files, etc.) requires either a 35mm or DSLR. I had mentioned that to her just in conversation because we were talkiing about taking pictures of Matthew & Scarlett & she really listened, ya know?

Anyway, we have already taken 550 pictures! WOW!

Saturday afternoon David & I left MIL with the babies for a while - we were shopping but ended up staying at one store for almost 5 hours! They were having an "extra 10% off" sale and if you applied for their credit card you got another 10% off, then a lot of toys were 20% off, so we tried to get as much as possible. We also bought the Rock Band game for BIL (from MIL, but she hadn't been able to find it) and we saved money on it because of the sale & credict card! After spending 5 hours there my feet hurt so we came home. We had planned to go "out" Saturday night but after that excursion we were both tired! I think that's a definite sign we're getting old?

Recipe Friday - Pineapple Casserole

I've decided to TRY and post a favorite recipe every Friday. Enjoy :)

Pineapple Casserole

2 20oz cans of pineapple, in juice (I use chunks)
2 c shredded cheddar cheese
2/3 c sugar
1/3 c all purpose flour
1 c Ritz crackers, crushed
1/4 c butter, melted

Drain the pineapple, reserve 1/3 c of juice. Place pineapple in a lightly greased casserole dish. Cover with cheese, then mix it up a little. Combine reserved pineapple juice, sugar, and flour. Pour over cheese. Combine cracker crumbs and butter and sprinkle on top. Bake at 400* for 25 minutes.

Note - I have baked this at 325, 350, 375, and 400 for different lengths of time. It seems to come out best when I bake it at 400, but it just depends on what else I'm cooking what temp I use.

Christmas Magic

I have always loved Christmas and can't wait to pass down certain traditions to our children, but one of the things I'm not so good about is decorating. Oh, I LOVE Christmas decorations, but I'm very much a "put it up at Thanksgiving, take it down at New Year's" kind of girl. Since David and I have been married, we always go visit family for Thanksgiving and Christmas (with the exception of the year we were awaiting Matthew's arrival). We sometimes start Christmas shopping before Thanksgiving, but most years the bulk of our buying is after Thanksgiving. So many years I would be out of town for work and then we only had weekends...we had to choose to either shop or decorate, so we shopped. The years I spent more time at home we decorated too. We actually have 3 trees of various sizes that have different "themes" and go in different rooms. We also had garland, velvet bows, & icicle lights for the outside of our old house - here we don't have a lot of room for the garland, but maybe someday we'll do the outside!

This year we were out of town for a while at Thanksgiving and will be gone for 2 weeks at Christmas so we waffled about putting up a tree. Finally we decided to put up JUST a tree so we got started Monday night (I decided what the heck - we'll leave it up later in January!). David & I waited until Matthew & Scarlett were in bed and brought the tree up from the basement. We got the branches and lights on, then decided to wait until last night to add the ornaments. Yesterday morning when Matthew woke up & I brought him downstairs, he pointed at the tree and asked "what's that?" - I told him it was a Christmas tree and that was that. He didn't pay it much attention. Last night after we ate supper, David showed him the switch to turn the lights on & asked him if he wanted to turn them on. He climbed under the tree and flipped the switch. I tell you, the expression on his face made it worth it! He lit up more than the tree did! It was great. He sat watching if for quite a while, then we got out the ornaments and he helped us with a few of those before he had to get ready for bed.

This morning the first thing he did when I brought him downstairs was crawl under the tree to turn the lights on. We are planning to finish the ornaments tonight & hopefully I'll get some pictures up later this week.

Tupperware

Last night I was cleaning up after supper and had some leftovers. I grabbed a Tupperware container from the drawer to use for storage. To my surprise I found that it already had something in it. We have very little storage space in our kitchen and I don't usually put lids on tupperware and rubbermaid - I stack them inside each other, but this specific piece I stack others inside and then put the lid on. I guess sometime we put food in it and then the other one of us didn't realize it was food inside so we put it in the drawer. Even more surprising is that the food still *looked* edible. No way was I going to try it though! The last time I made quesadillas was before we went out of town for Thanksgiving - THAT'S how long the tupperware kept it! Needless to say I'll be checking my tupperware a little more closely before putting it away from now on!

to the doctor

Yuck. One evening last week I thought Matthew's ear looked a little gunky, but the next morning it looked fine and he didn't seem bothered by it, so I ignored it. I don't want to be one of those people that calls the doctor over every little thing, but if the office had been open that evening I would have called. I waited, it looked better, I didn't call. Makes sense, right?

Yesterday it started looking gunky again, and this morning when he woke up it was awful. I set up and appointment and took him in. Poor little guy has such a high tolerance for pain, we don't know he has an ear infection until it ruptures and sure enough, that's what happened. He didn't want me touching his ear this morning, so I know it hurts. I also tried to prep him for the doctor checking it by telling him that the doctor couldn't make him feel better without checking it, and that he should be a big boy for the doctor. When the doctor started to examine him, he looked at me with a little hesitation and I said "remember I told you the doctor would need to look at your ears?" so he sat quietly while the doc checked him out. When the doc was finished, Matthew looked at me and said "big boy" - I told him yes he was and then the doctor bragged on him too. :)

Matthew weighed 29 lbs - surprising to me since when we were in GA before Thanksgiving he felt a lot heavier than my niece, but she weighed 31 lbs at her last check up. Someone's scale isn't accurate!

I had Scarlett with me so I asked them to weigh her too (I'm still a little bothered by her not gaining a lot of weight between 2 & 4 months, after gaining quickly early on). She weighed 15 lbs 1 oz, which means she had gained more weight since her 4 months apointment than she had gained between 2 & 4! That surprised me since breastfed babies usually slow down around this time. At the same time it makes me feel much better about her weight!

Visit to Santa, and other random thoughts

Last weekend we decided we HAD to buy Matthew new shoes so we headed off to the outlet mall. We hoped to get some Christmas shopping done also and planned to visit a huge store that has all things Christmas. Matthew woke up at 6am, early even for him! I got up with him and figured Scarlett would be up soon (she went to bed around 9 and hadn't gotten up during the night - that was 3 nights out of 4 so we are making progress) so I let David sleep and planned to shower after Scarlett ate. Well, she didn't get up until almost 10 so we got off to a really late start, considering it is over an hour drive to the outlet mall. Anyway, I got Scarlett fed then got ready to go and decided to pump in the car on our way - I was pretty engorged since she went so long without sleeping, even after she ate! I also thought it might make shopping easier if she would take a bottle, and figured if she didn't take the bottle I would still be able to feed her. So when we got to the Christmas store, I put her in the sling and tried feeding her - she GULPED down 8 oz of the bottle! She has never taken that much before, and never taken a bottle from me, other than in the car with my arm reaching over the seat! I love progress!

The Christmas store had a Santa Claus and the 2 nice things were that you got a coded sticker for your child, then they called the codes so you got in line then (no hours long wait) and you took the picture with your own camera - so no paying $20 for a single 5x7. I am very particular about Santas though - for pictures it has to be a "real Santa". When we were growing up I used to want to talk to every Santa we saw, and my mom would tell me "well he's not real, wait until we go see the real one" - and one Saturday we would make the trip to the mall (70 miles away, seemed like forever in those days) that had the real Santa. Now what, you may ask, makes a real Santa? It's actually pretty simple I think - everything about him is real - none of that fake beard business! So when we got the stickers for the kids, we asked the woman if Santa was real and she said yes. David actually said "his beard is real?" to double check, because the glance I caught of him from far away I didn't think he was real and she said "of course". So we got the stickers and waited until our code was called. We stood in line for about 5 minutes and then got up to see Santa. While this was a great personality Santa Claus, and he took a good bit of time with each child, he was NOT a REAL SANTA! How in the world could the huge Christmas superstore NOT have a REAL Santa?!?!?! So, we took their picture in his lap and made plans to take them to the mall to have their picture made with a real santa...not that they care, it's all about us, I know, but I don't feel like Christmas is complete without a Santa picture.

As for the rest of the trip - we bought several Christmas presents, we got Matthew some shoes, and it was overall a good day.

Neighborly

Did I spell that right? It looks funny to me, but I'm pretty sure it's right. Anyway, we bought our house a little over 2 years ago. When we moved in none of our neighbors seemed very friendly. The couple on one side of us did water our grass (I think they realized we were busy trying to get the house ready to move into) a couple of times, but they hardly spoke to us when we saw them out in the yard. The people on the other side only talked to us twice in the first year we lived here, and one of those was to ask if they could "borrow" our driveway when they had a party. I am always nice to them and they are always nice to us, but I wouldn't feel right running next door to borrow an egg if I was baking, ya know?

I've since learned that one of our neighbors is much nicer than I realized. We got home from our week and a half long Thanksgiving trip around 6:30 that Sunday night. It was cold, dark, and snowing. David noticed that a lot of our neighbors had leaves piled in the street, so he thought maybe they were doing leaf collection Monday. He called and sure enough, it was scheduled. He was tired and sick so he didn't want to rake that night and our blower is on the fritz. I told him I would rake if I needed to, but he has this "thing" about me doing what he views as "man's work" so I finally convinced him just to wait & we would do it later. Too bad that was the last pick up and now we have to rake them, bag them, and let them be collected on trash day. That's a lot more work than just raking them into the street! Anyway, David came home at lunch that Monday & started fussing at me for raking. I told him I hadn't and he wouldn't believe me. I finally told him one of our neighbors must have done it. Someone had raked our front yard! Now I'm not sure if they did it because they are really nice and knew that we hadn't been home for over a week, or if they just did it to keep the leaves from blowing into their yard, but either way - that's a pretty damn good neighbor.

So I am planning to bake cinnamon rolls (either this weekend or the next) and I will be taking a pan to each of my next door neighbors, just to be neighborly. (Well and to thank them but since I don't know who to thank I'll just cover both!)

Scholastic books

I am a self admitted nerd, and rather proud of it. I don't think of myself as a nerdy nerd though. As a child, one of my favorite things in school was ordering books from the scholastic books flyer. I loved those little newspaper-type pages that we got once a month or so. I would go through it the day we got one and circle with a colorful pen the books I wanted. More often than not, more of the books were circled than left uncircled. So imagine my joy when, in late October, Matthew came home from daycare with a scholastic books flyer!

Once again I was able to go through and circle the books, but this time it was choosing the ones I thought he would like. Once again, I had more of the brochure circled than not. I handed it to David and said "why don't you look at what I've circled and pick a few?" This is eerily similar to the way I used to hand it to my mom at the end of that school day so she could narrow down my choices and order me a few books. I really love books, and so far Matthew seems to also - but really, how many books does an (almost) 2 year old need? David picked up the first shipment from the scholastic orders earlier this week, and of couse that meant a new brochure. I am resisting the urge to circle everything on it! We put up the first shipment to use as Christmas gifts / stocking stuffers, but maybe I can give those to him. We should have more by Christmas anyway! :)

I may just breastfeed forever

This isn't really about breastfeeding, but last night I discovered one of the unexpected benefits of it. Since Scarlett needed to nurse after we finished eating supper, David gave Matthew his bath. As I sat with Scarlett, I heard David almost shout "here, sit on the potty", followed by the sounds of commotion. Finally I heard Matthew fussing "no potty" and David telling him to wait while he cleaned the tub. So I can kind of figure out what has happened. David sticks his head out of the bathroom and asks if Scarlett is still eating. I said yes so he walks out of the bathroom & starts going through cleaning supplies, grabs a bottle, and heads back into the bathroom. A few minutes later he comes out and says Matthew peed in the potty, but he wasn't sitting behind the "guard" so it went everywhere. He also says Matthew pooped a little in the tub. Of course I realize then that if I hadn't been feeding Scarlett I would have been the one to get the mess in the tub. Sweet girl you might just nurse until Matthew moves out of the house. :)

The good news of Matthew pooping in the tub is that it was obvious he was about to do it, David just wasn't fast enough. He said Matthew actually stood up in the tub and then squatted down, so when David made the connection, he sat him on the potty. Unfortunately it took David a few seconds too long to make the connection. Then Matthew wouldn't poop on the potty, he only peed. So, not sure what this means for potty training, other than I know that at least some of the time, Matthew KNOWS he needs to poop before he does it. I think we need to be diligent about watching him and putting him on the potty when he assumes the position. But what do we do when he doesn't follow through and poop? Last night I figured he'd finish pooping as soon as he got a diaper on, but he didn't. He didn't poop again until this morning...I know "they" say holding it in isn't good for children, so how do we get around it?

the haircut

I had an appointment to get my hair cut the Friday we arrived in Georgia. Unfortunately as we got to my parents' house, my sister called to tell me the guy called her and had to cancel. One of his clients died and he had to go to the funeral home to fix her up. So I called another lady in town - she used to cut my hair way back when, so I thought she would do a good job too, not as good as the guy, but I was tired of waiting. Every time I schedule with him something happens, so I figure it's just not meant to be for him to cut my hair. She kind of freaked out when she found out I wanted to cut it all off, but I am so happy with it. She could not cut one ponytail - she had to separate it into 4 ponytails to cut it off. My hair is deceptively thick. What amazed me was how long it still seemed after she cut off the ponytails and how much hair was on the floor when she was completely done!

I can shower, wash & condition, blow dry, and do makeup in less time than it used to take me to shower, wash & condition, and comb it out! It is great. My only complaint is that I think I need some product to give me a little volume...somehow when she fixed it, it looked great & she didn't use anything in it, but I think I need to. I can't do it quite like she did. Here are some pics:

The front (forgive the crazy expression on my face - I don't do well taking pics of myself):


The back - I really love the back, although I don't think it looks as good in the pic as it does in the mirror:


The ponytail - I measured it and it was a good 16.5" from the start of it to the bottom of it, not including some of the longer pieces at the bottom:

Finally home

Finally home, and wow what a trip. We put about 3000 miles on the car over the last week and a half. We left here Thursday morning, not as early as we would have liked, but we were off and running. It was a pretty dreary day, which is good and bad. Good because it makes the trip go faster, since we can't really stop to let Matthew play at parks. Bad because we can't stop and let Matthew play and he gets antsy in the car. Matthew and Scarlett were both really good in the car all day - we stopped for a few short breaks to change diapers, get food (although all food was eaten on the road), pee...that sort of thing, but around 5:30pm we decided we should really let Matthew run around a little, so due to the weather we decided to find a shopping mall and hope it had a play area. Unfortunately the one mall we found (we were in the middle of nowhere West Virginia) did not have a play area. Good thing Matthew didn't seem to mind! We found an area where they did have a few (3 I think?) of the "quarter rides" that you put money in and they do something for a few short minutes. Matthew ran from one to the other and climbed up, down, and around them so we didn't bother putting quarters in. He had a good time just climbing. We sat in the food court and ate supper, I nursed Scarlett (poor girl had to take bottles all day except for first thing in the morning) and we got on the road again. We finally stopped at a hotel about 2 hours from "home". We packed smart and had put the essentials for one night in a separate suitcase, so we only needed to unload a few things. I think we were all asleep by 1:30.

The next morning we got up a little later than normal and took our time leaving the hotel. We had to find a Hardee's for breakfast - this is one of David's "musts" on any trip down south - the nearest Hardee's is about an hour drive from us and they don't even have chicken biscuits! We got "home" around lunch time so we had the house to ourselves for a few hours before my mom got home from school. That was kind of nice - we were basically lazy. I was supposed to get my hair cut, but the guy had to cancel due to another client's death - he had to go to the funeral home to fix her up. Not to be disrespectful but David said you'd think he would be more concerned about keeping his repeat business happy! That's my smart ass husband for you!

My mom got a birthday cake for Matthew and Belle, since Thanksgiving is about halfway between their birthdays. It had 2 candles on each end, but when they lit the candles Belle quickly blew out the ones on her end and then stood up to reach Matthew's and blow them out too. We tried relighting them but Matthew didn't care and Belle did it again. She's such a cutie. Matthew did like licking the icing off the candles - he quickly figured out that it was good to redip them into the cake too and spent several minutes getting more icing on the candles then licking it off. I guess Matthew has changed since Belle saw him because she points to him in pictures and says his name, but all she would say when she saw him was "that boy". She knew Scarlett immediately though, running in the house towards her and saying "hey ca-ca".

We left Sunday to drive some more - to FL this time, to see David's mom. The children were good on this drive too. We were kind of back and forth in Florida, visiting David's mom and his dad - it ended up being a lot of time on the road and I think both kids got tired of their carseats! Hell I was tired of it too! Matthew also got a little sick while we were there - he had a terrible cough and fever for a few days. I gave him Tylenol for the fever and some cough medicine (I don't care what "THEY" say, even if cough medicine doesn't cure you, it sure as heck can relieve the symptoms!) and that seemed to help a lot. The fever only lasted a couple of days, the cough lingered but is much better now.

Friday night I was really dreading the ride home. I knew it would be at least another 2 full days of driving and possibly more, if Sunday traffic was as bad as I've seen it in the past. Fortunately I was just wrong in my pessimistic attitude and we were home by 6:30 last night. I am very thankful to have children who are good in the car. We've also found several great parks along the way, and yesterday the weather was good (cold but clear) so we were able to let Matthew play for a while. Anytime we find a nice park we save it in the GPS favorites so we can be sure to find it again.

We were also able to sneak in a date night while in Florida. I was kind of reluctant to leave both children home with David's mom, just because her house is not at all child-proofed and for us to have time to have a real date, we would be gone long enough that Scarlett would have to be fed. Here it is sometimes difficult for me to watch Matthew while I nurse her, and our house is pretty child-proofed - I can at least gate off the area that I know is safe. Add to that Scarlett still not liking the bottle and I figure it's too much to ask of one person. So we waited until Matthew was in bed then went to a movie. We saw No Country for Old Men. It was a good movie but I didn't care for the ending. It was nice to have a night out though - I think that's 2 in 2 months!

Happy Thanksgiving

I know, I'm over a week early, but we are leaving town today for a 20 hour (yikes) drive to visit my mother in law. We are breaking the trip up, staying with various family members for a couple of nights here and there, hopefully that will make the drive less stressful. I also hope we only have to spend one night at a hotel, but I would guess it will be at least 2. I should be back the Sunday night after Thanksgiving.

I hope you all have wonderful Thanksgiving holidays - while I'm dreading the trip, I know I have so much to be thankful for. I am blessed indeed!

On a related note

Yesterday I mentioned what great customer service I've experienced when shopping with Zappos. On a related note, today I'd like to share about GoodSearch. I've added a button to my sidebar that will hopefully remind people to use it. GoodSearch is a search engine that will donate to a charity of your choice every time you perform a search through it. It also has a shopping feature that takes you to a variety of online retailers, including Zappos (who donates 6% of your purchase to your charity), Target, Best Buy, Old Navy, Gap, Walmart...the list goes on and will soon include Amazon.com! Each retailer donates a percentage of your purchase amount to the charity.

This is a great easy way to have money donated to your favorite charity, or the charity of the day selected by GoodSearch. The search engine is powered by Yahoo! so I typically get great results.

Good customer service can still be found

Yes, that's right - good customer service still exists. This is going to sound an awful lot like a big ol' ad for Zappos, but they really have wonderful customer service. First, they offer free shipping - I think the standard is 2-day, but every time I have ordered from them I have gotten "free overnight shipping". Second, they offer FREE return shipping! YEP, that's right - if you order something and it doesn't fit, you can go right to their website & print out a UPS return label (you can also do USPS labels but I have not used that option). Third, their prices beat a lot of other sites that I've comparison shopped on. Fourth, they allow you to return anything within 365 days of purchase (yep, 1 year unless it's a leap year!). Fifth, did I mention FREE shipping on returns?

Earlier this year for David's birthday I ordered him some boots. I had no clue what style he would like, but I knew he wanted some, so I figured ordering from Zappos.com was a safe bet - I could return them if he didn't like them, and we could go shopping somewhere else. Turns out he loved the style but I got the wrong size. Me being me (that means lazy) I waited months to try to exchange the shoes. I finally started the process last Thursday, only to realize the boots were more expensive now than when I ordered. I was planning to just return the one pair and buy a new pair in 2 separate transactions, but I decided to call them in the hopes that I could do an even exchange. They were very easy to work with, they took my new order and emailed me a return shipping label for the pair that didn't fit, all while honoring the original price. I thought they told me that the new pair would ship when the received the return, but low and behold Friday MORNING the doorbell rang & there stood the UPS guy with a Zappos box. The boots were here less than 24 hours after I called them! And I hadn't even dropped off the box I was returning yet! How's THAT for service?

I will add that Matthew just LOVES David's boots. So much so that he had to try them on, and walk around in them. I don't even think his feet touch the sole of the shoe on the inside, but somehow he managed to walk around the family room wearing them. I think Santa might bring Matthew a pair of boots!

On another note, we took Matthew shoe shopping Sunday and he did great. Usually if I try a pair of shoes on him he screams and doesn't want me to take them off. Somehow Sunday he didn't mind me trying pair after pair on him though - and he didn't get upset when we left the store empty-handed. Yes, he has a shoe fetish already. I usually just buy shoes that I think will work and try them on him once we get home!

so tired

I have been holding back frustration lately, or trying to anyway. David has been putting in really long hours at work and it is getting so hard - I am finding a whole new appreciation for single parents. We are blessed with 2 really good children - so far they are both pretty laid back and easy going. But the past couple of weeks David has not been home in time to help at supper and bedtime every night. I can handle it on my own but when I'm so used to him being there so we can split the duties it is hard not having him. It's also easier when I know in advance and can mentally prepare. Lately I've been finding out at 5:30 that he wouldn't be home "on time" and finding out in the middle of cooking supper just stresses me out.

When he has come home in time for supper, he has gotten on the computer as soon as both children were in bed and worked late into the night (or early into the morning). In our 10 years married we have maybe not gone to bed at the same time 10-15 times when we were both home. It has been a time that no matter what was going on, we had an opportunity to talk and reconnect. In the past 2 weeks he has stayed up so late working that I've gone to bed 3-4 times without him. On top of missing out on that reconnect time, he's so busy with work even when he is home that I am missing out entirely. I get so little adult interaction that I really depend on spending my evenings with him and lately I haven't had that.

Last night was the icing on the cake though - he told me yesterday at lunch he would be working late, but didn't think it would be too late. The hours wore on, and that wouldn't be such an issue, if it weren't for the fact that I have a really hard time going to sleep in our bed without him there, and I could not sleep. It didn't matter how long I tried, sleep would not come. To make my long whiny complaint a little shorter, he finally came home at 5:15 this morning! So here I am, starting my work day with no sleep, well unless I count the 10 minutes I dozed while Scarlett was nursing.

Oh yeah, she went to bed around 8:45 last night - I didn't hear a peep out of her all night - I had to wake her up at 6:45 this morning to get her ready for daycare! Ah, progress!!

I just really miss David - even when he's home he's not here, and these long nights are getting to be too hard. I need him. I need him in so many ways...I need him to give Matthew a bath, or to play with Scarlett while I clean up after supper, or to sit on the couch and watch tv with me, and to kiss me goodnight. He promises the long hours will end soon, I pray he's right. I'm ready to have him back! Meanwhile, I'm trying to be supportive and not nag him, but each day it gets harder. I know it's hard on him too.

my ponytail

I have been growing my hair out for a while, planning all along to cut it short and donate the ponytail to Locks of Love, but my sister (who happens to work for the American Cancer Society) told me about the Pantene Beautiful Lengths program. They collect hair and have wigs made for cancer patients. So I figured I would donate to that instead. It doesn't really matter - either way the hair is going to a good cause.

I really started my plan because David likes my hair long and I like it short - I wanted to cut it but he was complaining. I have done the whole "it's MY hair" thing in the past, and I really don't worry about what he prefers (for my hair anyway) but I thought it would be an easy compromise. I told him that I would let it grow until it got long enough to donate, then I would cut it short. I figured this way he couldn't give me a hard time about cutting it.

So anyway, I just wanted to take a moment to urge any of you that might have long hair, if you ever decide to cut it, please consider donating your ponytail to one of these groups. It has to be the easiest thing you can do for a charity, it makes you feel good, and most importantly, it helps someone out there that's going through a rough time. I haven't made my appointment to cut mine yet, but once it's done I'll share before & after pics!

Rambling, rambling

I'm gonna start by saying how much I HATE standard time. I HATE HATE HATE it! I hate how early it gets dark in the evenings. I really wish we could just stay on daylight savings time all year. I guess I should be thankful to Congress for extending it, huh?

Now that I have that rant out of the way, I'll talk about my children. (Of course, what else did you think I would talk about?) Matthew is so funny sometimes, without even trying, and I just know we're going to get some questions about some of it one of these days. Since Scarlett has gotten better about taking bottles at daycare but still isn't great about it, I've been trying to have David give her at least one each day over the weekend so that she doesn't go 4 days straight without having one. On Fridays and Mondays I don't worry about it - if she won't take it from someone else she sure as heck won't take it from me, and it's just not worth the time. Anyway, Sunday afternoon David fed Scarlett and I started getting the milk machine ready to pump. I moved the motor and tubes to the couch and went to get the bottles & flanges. When I came back, Matthew had the tubes and was saying "booby pump, Matthew pump" - over and over again. He got upset when I took the tubes so that I could put everything together & pump - he kept trying to grab the bottles and put them up to HIS chest. I finally went and got him the manual pump that I have just so I could pump in peace. David & I were cracking up over this. Then today, I was changing clothes and he was in my room - he grabbed my nursing pads and was saying "boobies" holding them to his chest. I hope I'm not warping my son by exposing him to all of these nursing adventures! I can only hope that 1) he forgets this entirely and/or 2) he is very supportive of his future wife about breastfeeding.

Scarlett meanwhile, is taking the bottle better! I know, I already said that, but if you understood my frustrations, you would understand why I keep celebrating it! I am hoping that she will increase her intake during the day and STOP waking up at night. Last night she went to bed at 8:30, woke up to nurse at 11:15, was back asleep at 11:30 and I had to wake her up this morning to feed her before daycare! This is a huge step - she had been sleeping through the night for a while but once she started daycare she started waking again, sometimes more than once! That's hard when I have to work the next day.

Matthew also said "zebra" this morning. I was dressing Scarlett and he was studying her pants. I told him they were striped like a zebra. Then when I put her shirt on and he saw the zebra, he pointed and said it. I guess I shouldn't be surprised - he can repeat pretty much anything we say (we've heard "shoot" and "crap" but nothing worse....YET!). I still don't know why he refused to say "trick or treat" last week - oh well.

Matthew seems to take after me in his love of Reese Cups. He has a lot of Halloween candy, and we have been offering him a piece every night after supper. The first night David asked him if he wanted candy & he said "Reese cup" plain as day. I was amazed. Since then if we offer something he will take it, but if we ask what kind he wants he always tells us "Reese Cup." Maybe he is mine after all!

My final thought for the day - so many times in the middle of a moment I think to myself that I need to blog about that moment, but when I sit down at the computer it's like I can't remember those moments. I guess even a rookie gets writer's block?

Halloween rules?

Last night was the first time we've taken Matthew trick or treating. Last year we were on an airplane during the TOT hours. This year Matthew's daycare had an event Tuesday afternoon - they called it "Trunk or Treat" and basically the parents parked with trunks open, candy ready, and the children went around the lot trick or treating. It was nice to get to see so many of the children in their costumes, and I think Matthew enjoyed it. Then last night we got them in their costumes again and went around to a few houses in our neighborhood. In our town we have pretty informal neighborhood associations, that plan occasional events, and it's strange to me, but the people who live across the street are a different association than we are. That's ok - they are still friendly when we see them out in their yards. One house has really beautiful grass so we asked them for advice on some areas of our lawn that needed work, you know, nice neighborly stuff.

So when we started out last night, the first 4 houses we went to were not passing out candy! WHAT? Who doesn't pass out candy on Halloween, yet stays home with their lights ON? Anyway, we noticed a lot of houses down one of the side streets were decorated so we decided to go to those. That worked out a lot better. Matthew got the hang of knocking on doors but he didn't understand he shouldn't go inside the house! He also wouldn't say "trick or treat" no matter how much I tried! He did however, say "tank you" to everyone, sometimes more than once! At one house the woman's cat was at the door and he started saying "kit cat" - so she thought he really liked the KitKat she gave him & gave him a handful more! He walked a lot more than I expected him to, only occasionally asking us to carry him.

As the evening went on, more and more people were just hanging out on their porches and got to be pretty talkative. At one house I felt like we were in the wrong neighborhood - when she found out we lived ACROSS the main street she talked about trick or treating on the streets BEHIND our house. I guess I need to learn the rules...you see, I grew up in the boonies and we had to DRIVE to TOT. There were no neighborhoods. We went to town and only went to houses where we knew the people - either from church or from them working with our parents. And yeah, we seriously drove from house to house. Since David & I have been married we've passed out candy to a lot of children we didn't know, so I know it's OK to go to a house where you don't know the people - but what are the boundaries? I mentioned to my mom before we went that I felt bad going to neighbors' houses when I don't know them, but she pointed out that I won't get to know them if I don't go, so I thought that was a good point and figured what the heck - I really just wanted Matthew to have fun - and he seemed to. He was dressed as a monkey and would make monkey sounds at people. He finally started saying "teat" when we went up to them too. So, he said "teat", made monkey sounds, said "tank you" and "bye". Occasionally if someone asked about Scarlett he would say "shish-ter....ye-ah" (ye-ah is how he says banana).

We got home and had some trick or treaters ourselves. The first people that came by appeared to be in their mid-twenties but they were dressed in great costumes and we were worried we had way too much candy, so we gave them 5 baggies each! David still ended up taking a lot of bags to work today!

Our weekend

Our weekends tend to be a big relief for me - I get to enjoy Matthew and Scarlett but David's home to help out with all the work. And of course I enjoy him too :) Saturday was pretty much consumed with doing stuff around the house - cleaning, laundry, typical boring stuff that there just isn't time for during the week. Sunday we did a little shopping. Our last stop was at the produce market and by the time we got there Matthew & Scarlett were both asleep in the car. David & I decided I would go in & shop while he sat with them. I got everything we needed for the week and then went up to check out. As I pulled out my credit card to swipe it, they said their system was down. I am the type that doesn't carry cash, and David had given me all of his when I went in another store earlier. I had $18 in my pocket, my total had come to $29+change. I called David to see if we had a checkbook in the car - no dice. So I turn to the man behind me and apologize for being slow, then start going through my bags trying to separate what we really needed versus what I just thought would be good to have (apple cider - nice to have, not required). As I do that the man behind the first man asks how much short I was, and I told him about $12 - he handed me a twenty. I couldn't believe the generosity of this man. I tried to refuse it but he insisted, so I checked out & handed him my change, thanking him profusely the entire time. When I got to the car I noticed an ATM down the street so I sent David to it to get some cash and we repaid the man - but still, I am amazed by his generosity. There are still nice people out there!

When I was going through my buggy at the market, I was torn about what to do with the pumpkin - it was only $2, but I needed to cut $12 of stuff. Fortunately I didn't have to decide, and after Matthew's nap we went to the deck to carve the pumpkin. I thought he would really enjoy it, but when he first got the guts on his hand he said "YUCK" and then would try to only grab seeds. And every time an airplane flew over he had to stop playing with the pumpkin and point up yelling "airplane". Boy does he love planes!

We grilled steaks for supper. Usually we cut Matthew's off the bone but lately he has been asking for the bone, so we decided to just cut it part of the way so he could eat it straight off the bone. Is it bad that we give our son steak bones for supper?

After supper Matthew said "bath" and then said "shish ter bath" - so I asked him if he wanted me to bathe Scarlett and him together. He said yes, which surprised me because I have only done that once and bath time is usually pretty rowdy so I thought he didn't like her being in there. He was so cute trying to help me bathe her - I just love the way he treats her. To think I worried about jealousy!

As for Scarlett, she is becoming more & more mobile. While she's been rolling over for quite a while, she hasn't rolled, and rolled, and rolled. Now it's like she'll roll across the room in the blink of an eye. She's also showing a lot more personality and playing with her toys a lot more. I enjoy each stage so much, but I hate how quickly they go through them!

Trying something new

David and I decided this weekend to try something new - a routine/schedule for ourselves...yes, that's right, US, not the children. We are really bad about going to bed late or "whenever" and that makes it hard to get up in the mornings. So we decided to give ourselves a bedtime. Hopefully this will help us get the sleep we need so that we're well rested for our work days and taking care of Matthew and Scarlett.

The one area where I could use some help is figuring out how to manage our evening routine. Scarlett is the difficult one here - when Matthew was her age I nursed him, then cooked/ate supper (or David cooked while Matthew nursed), then we put Matthew to bed. Once Matthew got older we established an evening routine that includes eating supper around 6-6:30. Now that Scarlett is here I sometimes struggle to get Matthew's supper "on time" because of her nursing. I realize this is something I should have figured out months ago, but I didn't, and it needs work now. So how do you handle this, if you have a somewhat set dinner time and you are nursing an infant? Or if you don't have a set dinner time but you have older children too?

I'll keep you posted on how this bedtime thing works for us - last night we were about 20 minutes late getting to bed and Scarlett woke up just as I was drifting off! I am hoping that by setting some new routines she will sleep longer for me at night. She had been sleeping through the night for a while, but since she started daycare she's been waking again. :(

This IUD

After I had Scarlett we decided that an IUD would be a good option for birth control. I had it inserted early September and would have sworn that I could feel it up there. It's not always a bad feeling, but I was aware of it, if that makes sense. Unfortunately sometimes it just plain hurts. It had gotten a lot better - to the point I didn't notice it, but now suddenly I can tell it's there again. I don't think this is normal. My other complaint is that I've been spotting and/or bleeding almost every day since I got it. That does a worse number on my sex life than having 2 children! So, I'm going to call my ob Monday to see what she thinks. I do think it's the best birth control option for me, but I'm worried it's not quite right if I can feel it. I can deal with the spotting for a while, but how long is it going to last???

These are the moments

Like everything, parenting has its ups and downs. Yesterday was a crazy day. I believe children thrive on routine, and I definitely saw the results of messing with routine. Normally David takes them to daycare but yesterday I took them. Matthew really didn't like that. Fortunately they were already eating breakfast when I got there so that distracted him and we avoided a meltdown. When I went to pick them up it was another story entirely. Again, he's used to David picking them up. I probably don't do things the same way but he was fine until we got to the parking lot. He didn't want to hold my hand to walk across the lot to the car. As he's fighting me I decide it's too windy to dilly dally and I picked him up. Not easy when he's struggling to get down, but I got him & Scarlett in the car. David worked late so I managed supper and bedtime on my own. Matthew was fussy the whole time - he does great when we're away from home without David but at home when David's not here it is different...he knows things aren't right. I could tell he wasn't sleeping good just listening to the monitor, but after David got home he fell out of the bed. David went in to check on him and I actually think that settled him down because he slept better. I think he was glad to know his daddy was home.

Of course, those aren't the moments I really want to post about. This morning both Matthew & Scarlett have been such pleasures. Scarlett woke up cooing & babbling, which I love. I think she does that most mornings but it's earlier than I want to wake up so I leave her hoping she'll go back to sleep and she ends up fussing. She slept late enough today that I was happy to get her when I first heard her. Then she & Matthew played in the family room, and when it was time to put Matthew down for his nap he teased me about kisses. Normally I take him to his room and sit on his bed with him in my lap & ask for a kiss and hug. Today when i asked for the kiss he leaned toward me like he was going to kiss me but turned away when he got close. He then smiled at me and said "I tease". he did that several times and just kept laughing. How cute...I figure he was trying to postpone his nap but it was so cute I let it go on for a bit. Finally I kissed his cheek & put him down. It was just really really cute.

Pictures

I'll try to find time to upload some pictures directly to my blog, but I tend to keep my dropshots site pretty up to date, so feel free to check it out anytime.

Date night

Saturday night the daycare we use had a "date night" for Sweetest Day. They charged what seemed like a pretty small fee to watch the children for 5 hours. David & I have never celebrated sweetest day, and we really didn't this year - we just treated it as a date night. No reason to spend money on cards, candy, or flowers! After we dropped the children off we went to dinner at a yummy seafood place, where we splurged on an appetizer, entrees, and dessert. The appetizer and dessert were shared (well the entrees were too but we got 2 of them).

We talked about going to a movie, since that's one of the few places we won't take Matthew & Scarlett, but there weren't any movies playing at convenient times, or any that looked particularly great. I love going to the theater, but if I'm spending the money on a movie I want action, something that is just fantastic on a big screen with surround sound. Not a comedy, not a romance -those come across just as well on my tv at home! So, we decided to skip the movie and go play putt-putt instead. I don't know the last time I played putt-putt, but it was a lot of fun. The place we went was doing "haunted golf" - they had Halloween decorations up everywhere and were using red light bulbs and lots of strobe lights. They also had flashing golf balls. There were "people" sitting in chairs scattered around the course - David kept telling me they were real but I didn't believe him. Then we got to a hole where they had something draped across so you couldn't see the hole from the tee area - when we walked around to the hole this voice from the side said "she almost had a hole in one"! I almost jumped out of my skin I was so startled (by the voice, not the almost hole in one). If David hadn't been telling me they were real people I would have probably really been scared!

One thing I realized while we were making plans is that it is ridiculous for me to be so attached to Scarlett. She sometimes refuses a bottle so I am afraid to be too far away from her for longer than 3 hours because I never know when I will need to feed her. (Daycare has called a few times because she won't eat for them and she is fussing, obviously hungry.) I HAVE to do something...I can't live the next 8 months never knowing when the phone is going to ring to feed her - anyone have any suggestions on getting her to take a bottle?

Scarlett's 4 month check up

Scarlett had her 4 month well visit today. Her stats:

13 lbs 12 oz (50-75%)
24.5" (50-75%)
40.5 cm head (50-75%)

She's only gained a little over a pound since her 2 month check up but the pedi wasn't concerned. I asked her advice on the bottle issue and she said her younger daughter started daycare at 4 months and wouldn't take one either. She said often she would take 1-2 oz and that was all. She basically said don't worry about it because Scarlett will make up what she's not eating at daycare at her other feedings. She did say the growth slow down was probably partially due to not eating much at daycare, but she didn't think it was reason to worry.

Scarlett got her recommended vaccines - she was not happy about them but she settled down pretty quickly. She rarely cries so it's really hard to hear her screaming.

Trip summary

First, the people who work for Northwest here are assholes. I was not able to get a gate pass for David to help me when we left, even though before I made the reservation their customer service people told me it wouldn't be a problem. That didn't start my morning off right. Then the flight attendant was a bitch. I put matthew's car seat rear-facing because that is supposed to be safer, and she told me if he got crushed in an impact between the 2 seats she would not be able to help me and it would be on me. I told her I would take that responsibility and that if we had an impact that severe his neck would be broken if he was front facing. I then thanked her for the wonderful customer service she was providing. Yep, that's the nice southern belle bitch in me. Anyway, the children were very well behaved on the flight. I knew I would need to feed Scarlett so I took the dvd player out for Matthew. Clifford was playing as they announced it was time to sore electronic devices for landing and when I turned it off Matthew screamed "more woof woof". Kinda cute but he was really upset with me. He didn't understand and I didn't have anything "better" than a dvd to distract him. Fortunately he did not fuss for very long.

Sunday we went to church with my family - both children were very good in church. My younger sister sang a solo and when she went up to the front Matthew kinda yelled out "Aunt Ash" - my sister loved it that he called her without prompting! While the offering was being collected the pianist was playing a special and when she stopped Matthew asked for "more please". I just love how vocal he has become! I also noticed in one of the hymns that he took the hymn book from my dad and then started swaying back and forth. A little farther into the song he started singing the tune, and actually got some of the words! Precious!

Scarlett was very attentive when it came time for the sermon! My mom knew it was naptime so she kept cradling her trying to get her to go to sleep but Scarlett would fuss so my mom would sit her up. When she was sitting up she stared at the preacher while he preached.

Near the end of the service Matthew was getting kind of restless so I pulled out the tupperware container of Cheerios. As soon as he saw it he loudly said "YUMMY". I was a little embarrassed but all of the people in the church were understanding and thought he was cute.

Monday we took Matthew fishing for the first time. He didn't seem too interested, but I guess that's because we didn't catch anything. He preferred watching the cows and horses. We were out playing in the yard and Matthew suddenly took off for the road. He headed straight for the combine that was left out in the field at Granny's. He wanted to climb and play on it, but I think he's a little too small. So instead my mom gets the lawnmower for him. They sit on it and she starts it up. He immediately started trying to push her off - he wanted it all to himself! So we shut it off and let him sit on it, but he wanted to go. It was pretty funny watching her try to sit on the edge so he could sit in the seat and drive! Maybe we have a farmer in the making?

Granny was doing MUCH better than our last visit - she was like a different person. I think she really enjoyed the babies this time. I am relieved that her health is so much better.

We had some professional portraits taken and I can't wait to see the proofs! I know it will be hard to choose though. The same guy who took these also did my wedding pictures 10 years ago so I am familiar with his work and have always been pleased with it in the past. His wife gave me a goody bag for Matthew as we were leaving and she put in a lot of candy. She mentioned that it might be good on the flight home. Yeah, just what I want - a sugar loaded toddler! LOL

The airport experience was much better at home than here - they gave my daddy a gate pass so he could go with us and help through security. It was much easier having an extra set of hands! Other passengers actually helped me get the car seat on the plane, but the flight attendant was very nice this time. It was amazing how much better I was treated on the return trip. The only negative was that the short term parking was closed and David could not park near the airport - he would have needed to take a shuttle to help me at baggage claim, so he just pulled up to the loading/unloading area. I was able to manage all the luggle and the children for a short walk to get to the car though, so even that wasn't too bad.

As nervous as I was about the experience, I felt like Superwoman that I was able to handle it! Silly I know.

Of course my visit home was wonderful - I always get homesick though because I really want to live closer to my family than we do. David is happy with his job and the economy here is awful, so it would be difficult to sell our house if we decided to move, so I kind of feel stuck here for a while. Hopefully things will change soon and we can relocate somewhere closer. Then of course I feel guilty for getting homesick because I know David is happy - and shouldn't I be happy anywhere that he is happy? And honestly, I am happy, I just know I would be happier if we lived in Georgia!

Off to Georgia

Tomorrow I'll be going to Georgia for a few days. I am SO nervous about the flight - I will be travelling alone with Matthew and Scarlett. I am taking Matthew's car seat for the flight because I don't think he would stay in the seat without it. So I'll have to manage getting me, Scarlett, Matthew, a car seat, and a diaper bag on the plane. Oh boy! I am crazy! Fortunately the airline told me I could get a gate pass for David to help me get through security to the gate. I also bought a traveling toddler to use to attach the carseat to a carry on. We used it on our Florida trip and while it wasn't super easy, it is easier than adding a stroller to everything else I need to carry. So I will strap Matthew to the carry on, Scarlett will be in either the sling or snugli, and I will have one hand free. Sounds good, right? So why am I so nervous?

Oh yeah, we also bought a portable dvd player. Matthew has always been very good on flights, until our trip to FL, then he was a little fussy part of the time. Since I won't have David (or anyone else with me) to help entertain him, and I will have Scarlett in my lap, I decided it was worth the investment to have a tv option. I am fairly "anti-tv" but sometimes you need that help. So we have some copies of Curious George and Clifford that will be in our carry on!

the little lotto player

I noticed Matthew playing with some spare change that somehow found its way to the floor. I'm not crazy about him playing with change, as that is one of the biggest choking hazards around our house. I mentioned it to David, in a nice nagging sort of way, since he's the only one who brings loose change into the house - mine either goes in my wallet or in the car, not in my pockets. He told me he would try to be better about putting it away, and then told me he had noticed Matthew playing with a penny earlier in the evening. Turns out Matthew had taken down one of the magnets off the refrigerator and was playing with it, then he found a penny, so he started trying to scratch off the magnet! Yep, he's a little lotto player in the making. When we were in Florida David's dad had gotten some scratch off tickets and let Matthew scratch them off, so we know exactly where the idea came from! Hopefully if he strikes it rich he'll take care of me in my old age ;)

What an idiot!

Somehow I have been posting to my blog but nothing was showing up. A friend pointed it out to me today, thinking that I meant to start blogging but never did. Boy do I feel stupid. I was using an editing software but somehow was submitting the posts wrong. Now to get them to show up I have to copy & paste, but when I do that all the links & pictures & stuff are not working. I am for now working on getting all the content up, then I'll try to add the other stuff, but until then, hopefully someone will enjoy reading all my thoughts from the past few months! LOL I have never felt dumber!

My idiotic moment of the day however, was when I managed to fall up the stairs this afternoon. Yep, UP the stairs. We were out in the yard playing and Matthew found a big rock. He played with it for a while, then left it in the grass to play with his truck on the deck. Scarlett & I sat in the swing while Matthew played. He asked for his rock, and rather than have him go back in the yard to get it, I told him to wait on the deck and I'd get it. Somehow as I'm coming back up the steps (about 7 of them) I trip and fall. I managed to hold Scarlett in a way that she didn't hit a thing, but I am sore and bruised. As I sat on the steps trying to compose myself, Matthew got upset. He sure is an empathic little guy.

Nice weekend

Saturday morning David and Matthew had a guys' morning out. David loaded Matthew and his shirts in the wagon and they went off to the dry cleaners. After dropping off the shirts they went to the barbershop, where they both got haircuts. Then David took Matthew to the park and let him play for a while. It was nice for them to spend the morning together, and nice for me to have a morning alone with Scarlett.

Yesterday we went to a nearby apple orchard. Matthew seemed to really enjoy it - we looked at pumpkins and he played in their straw play area. They also had an old tractor set up for children to climb on and he liked "driving" it. We went on a hayride that took us through the orchard where we were able to get out and pick apples. I think it was neat for Matthew to see where apples come from, even though I'm not sure he's old enough to make the connection. We did let him pick the apples, so maybe! He also went on a pony ride - one of the kind where the ponies go in circles. He loved that! Then we let him play in an inflatable pumpkin - he seemed a little nervous in it at first, not sure of his footing, but he got the hang of it and jumped and ran around. Then we shopped in the bakery for apple treats...YUM! The only downside to the day was the hot temperature - it is hard to do fall activities when it is 90 degrees!

back to work

Today was my first day back at work. I didn't feel at all ready to go back! I also hate having to send Scarlett to daycare. I know daycare is an issue every working mother deals with, and I am fortunate to have a center that I really like and feel comfortable with. I was lucky when Matthew was an infant that I could schedule my work around his naps but then he got to an age where he didn't nap enough for me to work the hours I needed to work. So we found a daycare and he's there part time. Since he is there part time, that means I have 3 days/week I can work from home. Even if Scarlett sleeps good, there's no way I can get in the hours I need to in 3 days/week if she's at home, so my choices were to send her to daycare 3 days/week or send Matthew every day and work while Scarlett naps. I don't like either option, but since I know eventually I wouldn't be able to work enough hours when she is napping, I decided to send her with Matthew 3 days/week. I guess I also feel like that is "fair" to Matthew - I would feel bad changing his schedule because of her. Of course when we think about "fair" I am not sure it is fair to Scarlett that I am starting her so much earlier than I started Matthew, but what can I do?

Anyway, it was a mostly good day except I had to go feed Scarlett around lunchtime. She hasn't been very receptive to the bottle and they called me after trying to feed her and listening to her fuss for half an hour because she was hungry. She just doesnt' seem to know how to latch on to the bottle nipple. Hopefully it will get better.

She nursed a lot tonight, I guess to make up for not eating a lot during the day. She's in bed now, hopefully she won't wake me up too often!

Florida

We just got back from a trip to Florida. I was hoping to go to the beach but we weren't able to squeeze it in. We arrived Thursday night and some other family got there Friday. We stayed with David's mom but visited his dad too. All in all it was a nice visit. It's always nice to have family around because I can take naps :)

We went to a little water park in their town that is pretty neat. Matthew seemed to enjoy playing in the sprinklers they have. Of course I got soaked too!

The flights were not too bad - I was nervous but both children were fairly well-behaved. They had their moments though! It makes me nervous to think about flying with them both by myself, but somehow I will manage.

So cute

My dad got here this morning. Matthew was at daycare but I told my dad we would pick him up early. When we went to pick him up, I left Scarlett and daddy in the car while I went in to get Matthew. He didn't want to leave daycare at first - he seemed to know it was early. But when we walked out the door to the center, my dad stepped out of the car and Matthew took off "running" to him! It was SO cute! My family worried when we had Matthew that he wouldn't remember them since we live so far away and we wouldn't get to visit often, but it has been 2 months since Matthew saw my dad, but the joy on his face was there! He remembers!

Home alone

But not alone - David left early Saturday morning to go to Atlanta for a Georgia Tech recruiting event. I was alone with Matthew and Scarlett all day, which isn't too unusual since I am home with them during the week too. The more unusual part was not having David home by 6pm to help out until bedtime. I somehow managed to get Matthew to bed, pretty close to on time too :) (Lately I've been nursing Scarlett around Matthew's bedtime, so David has been handling Matthew's bedtime routine.) Scarlett slept most of the evening too.

I was able to watch the Georgia Tech football game, kind of. I dvr'd it and started watching late, but knew I should "catch up" by half time. David called me and I assumed it was half time, so I answered my phone with "I'm just starting the second quarter" so that he would know not to divulge any information about the game. Unfortunately, the game sucked! We got our butts kicked.

David got home around lunchtime Sunday, so I wasn't home alone for too long.

On another note, my dad is coming to visit! YAY! I am pretty excited. I really miss my family and love any opportunity to spend time with them.

Infertility

I have read several blog posts lately about infertility. It is an interesting topic, one with so much emotion involved. It brings about feelings that no one can imagine, even when they've been in those shoes. It amazes me that instead of trying to support each other on their journeys, women who are in similar situations still try to compare their pain with someone else's pain. (This is something that in general annoys me....I remember when Papa died I got really upset with people who said "I know how you feel" - because no matter if you've been in the same situation, you don't know how I feel!)

One of my favorite blogs is Nancy's - she has two absolutely beautiful little girls and is currently trying to conceive (ttc) #3. It took her a long time to conceive her first, with no explanation for why. She "got lucky" with #2 and only "tried" for one month. She is experiencing the pain of infertility again, and a lot of first timers don't/can't understand her pain. She is one of the most knowledgeable people I "know" about ttc. She is a great chart reader for people who are charting their fertility signs and she has always seemed willing to help and advise anyone who needs it. She doesn't come across as a know-it-all, just someone who has been there and done their homework. She participates in message boards where first timers can benefit from her knowledge, but it seems they are giving her a hard time, as if she has no right to be upset over having trouble ttc#3 since she has 2 children. She can't understand their pain since she has been blessed 2 times. The fact is, she went through what they are going through, and while I stand beside the thought that her feelings about it are not the same as their feelings about it, I still think she has some understanding of what they are going through. Now she's feeling a similar pain, but it's not the same...it's different! Yes she has 2 children, but that doesn't stop her from wanting more and it certainly doesn't mean it doesn't hurt!

Anyway, this all brings me to me. Way back I used to say I wouldn't get married and have children. I didn't want them - as a child I never really cared for babies, didn't do a lot of babysitting as a teen, just didn't really like children too much. I thought I would be a big career woman with no time for a family. THEN I met David. Once I fell in love I decided a family wouldn't be so bad. So I had visions of the perfect little family....him, me, then children - a boy and a girl - in that order! When we first found out we were pregnant, I just knew it was a boy. I don't know why or how, but I knew it. I was not at all surprised at our 20week ultrasound when they said it was a boy. When Matthew was 10-1/2 months old, we found out we were expecting again. Suddenly I felt that I wanted more than 2 children. I am not sure why, but it was almost immediate - as soon as I knew we were having a second, I thought I wasn't ready to be "done" having children. I don't really know how to explain it and it probably makes me sound selfish, but I just didn't feel like 2 would be "enough".

The second time I had a feeling it was a girl, but I wasn't as sure, and I really didn't care. I thought a girl would be nice, but it would also be nice for Matthew to have a younger brother that he could be best buddies with. Plus I could have more, right? Then we found out we were having a girl, and of course I was excited. Of course it amazed me that people would say "one of each - that's perfect". I guess it amazed me because I felt that way, until I decided that I wanted more than 2 children.

Who is to say what is "perfect"? I think "perfect" is different for everyone. Some couples choose to be childless...for them that is "perfect"; some choose to have one child, some choose to have 10...for them that is "perfect". It really annoys me when people assume out loud that because I have one of each I am "done" having children. Maybe I am, maybe I'm not.

Anyway, these discussions I've read on other blogs about primary or secondary infertility has made me think a lot about it. What if I can't get pregnant again? (Now I have no reason to believe I can't, but what if?) I know it will be painful for me. I KNOW I want to experience pregnancy, childbirth, that newborn stage, everything....AGAIN. My heart will be broken if I can't. I can't compare that heartbreak to what my friends who haven't been blessed with their first child yet feel because it would definitely be different. But it would be there all the same...

I have several friends who were ttc when I met them. A lot of them have one or more children now, some are expecting, some are still trying. Others are off the ttc train for now...some will be back on it, some probably will not. I cannot imagine their pain and I would assume that the pain is the same for each of them. I know it's not. I wish I could get rid of that pain, but unfortunately there is nothing I can do but offer my support and prayers that they get what they want. I hope that each of them knows if I say something "wrong" that they should let me know it hurts because I never want to add to their pain.

Nursing woes - updated

While I still have no idea what caused her to NOT eat Friday & Saturday nights, she ate last night on a much more normal schedule. It is such a relief.

I know most of the time babies will eat when they are hungry, and no matter how much milk I pump and store in the freezer, I still can't help but remind myself that breastfeeding is all about supply and demand. So when she gets out of sorts for a day or two and doesn't eat "normal" then my body thinks it doesn't need to make as much milk. I probably worry about this more than I should, huh?

Nursing woes

This breastfeeding thing can be so difficult sometimes. I know a lot of people have trouble getting it established, but once it's established it is pretty much a breeze (well at least it was for me with Matthew, and has been from day one with Scarlett). That's what has me so dumbfounded today. For the last 2 nights Scarlett has absolutely refused the breast. I get her in position to nurse and she starts screaming. She ate fine during the day, but Friday night around 7:30 she acted hungry so I tried to feed her and she wanted nothing to do with it. I didn't worry too much at that point, I put her down to play and tried again an hour later. Again, she screamed when I tried to nurse her. I tried a couple of more times until around 11pm and finally decided to just pump and go to bed. The last time she had eaten was at 4:30. She slept all night! I couldn't believe it. I didn't sleep well at all, listening for her breathing since I was sure something must be wrong for her not to want to eat!

Fast forward to last night, and the same thing happened. She ate around 4:45 yesterday afternoon and then wouldn't eat again - screamed every time I tried to feed her. David gave her a 4 oz bottle before we went to bed, just so I could relax a little that she had something in her tummy. She took the bottle, but I know the mechanics of feeding a bottle kind of force the baby to eat whether they want to or not.

I have no idea what is causing this - if anyone has any clues, please share!

not 100%

Matthew has been sick this week. Monday night he started running a fever and had a little cough and runny nose too. I called the pediatrician Tuesday morning but they said just treat the symptoms & give it some time, call back if it got worse or lasted much longer. I don't mean to whine (well ok maybe I do) but it is really hard taking care of a sick toddler and an infant. Thankfully Scarlett is a good baby - I can feed her, diaper her, and put her down - she is easily entertained and sleeps great. But still, when Matthew doesn't feel well is precisely when he wants to be held & cuddled - it is such a struggle to give him the cuddling he needs and tend to Scarlett at the same time, especially when she needs to eat. I have relied on the tv more than I would like to admit this week, but at least I can have Matthew in my lap while Scarlett eats this way. It breaks my heart that I can't give Matthew 100% of my attention when he is sick. It also breaks my heart that Scarlett spends a lot more time in the swing or in the pack and play looking at the mobile than Matthew did. This is true whether he is sick or not - frankly it is impossible for me to have as much one on one time with her as I had with him.

Matthew has such a sweet disposition and weeks like this I worry that having a baby sister so soon is going to affect that. I hope he continues to be the sweet, loving boy that he is now. I hope that she becomes a sweet, loving girl too, even though she doesn't get the attention that he got at her age.

GT vs Notre Dame

Labor Day weekend was fun - David & I got tickets to the GT game at Notre Dame at almost the last minute so we went to South Bend Saturday. We didn't have any GT gear that would fit Matthew so after posting to some online communities we are part of, someone from Atlanta that was coming up to the game offered to go shopping for us. I thought it was very nice of a complete stranger to make that sort of offer. So we got the kiddos up early Saturday morning and headed out. Met up with some friends of David's to tailgate and then David went to pick up Matthew's t-shirt bought by the kind man from Atlanta. We hung out in the parking lot for a while - it was quite fun as there were more Tech fans around than I expected. Even the ND fans were nice.

We ate lunch and then caught a bus from the parking lot to the stadium. After making our way to our seats, Scarlett decided it was time to eat. She refused the bottle we tried to give her so I kept putting her off until after kickoff. I watched the first ND series (they turned the ball over) and the first Tech one since we had such good field position - we scored a field goal and I left the stands to go feed Scarlett.

I think David & I both had fun at the game, although we had to leave the stands to take care of the children more often than we are used to leaving the stands. We are also both the "stand up and cheer" sort of fans, but that is harder when you have a toddler and an infant, so we didn't do quite our normal yelling. A positive about that is that we both had voices the next day.

When we were walking back to the car after the game, we ran into Buzz and the Tech cheerleaders. We had a family picture taken with Buzz and then took some with one of the cheerleaders too. Matthew was fascinated by Buzz - he kept pointing to Scarlett's onesie (she had a buzz on the front) and then at the real Buzz, saying "Buzz" - it was so cute. Buzz came over and spent some time "playing" with Matthew. It was easily the highlight of Matthew's day, and probably ours too, but the good win is a close 2nd!

I would have liked some more time to wander the ND campus but with the children it just wasn't easy. We decided it is a close enough drive that we could go visit on a day when there isn't a football game if we wanted to tour.

Sunday was spent catching up on the rest we missed Saturday, and then today was running errands we would normally do on Saturday or Sunday.

more on potty training

So yesterday I picked Matthew up at daycare. The assistant teacher mentioned that he was doing great at his potty training. My reaction was something like this: "huh? Matthew? potty?" She said yes and that they are working with one of the little girls in his class and he was showing interest so she started putting him on it too. I told her that here he has a couple of times told me he needed to potty or "phewy" and that I put him on it but he never does anything. She says he has used it there a few times, but only for #1.

David mentioned it to his normal teacher today & she said no they aren't working on it with Matthew, so I don't know what to think. In a lot of ways I think he is ready, or close to ready, but then in a lot of ways it is easier for me not to train him right now. Scarlett is so young that there are times she requires my attention and Matthew has to wait. It isn't like I can stop feeding her to go put him on the potty. I know this is my issue not his so for now I'll just keep watching for signs and if he wants to sit on the potty I'll put him on it.

Scarlett's two month appointment

We just got back from the pedi's office - here are Scarlett's stats:

weight - 12 lb 9 oz (90%)
height - 23" (75%)
head - 38.5 cm (50%)

The pedi says she is perfect...I made the 4mo checkup with her too cause I like hearing I have perfect children :)

Scarlett got stuck 3 times and had the oral rotovirus vaccine. She handled them ok - she kept turning her head from the oral and of course got the shocked look when they stuck her leg the first time. She hardly cried though and has been asleep since I put her in the car. Matthew didn't have any reaction to these so hopefully she'll follow suit.

could he be ready?

I'm starting to wonder if Matthew might be ready for potty-training. In my dreams, right? He has shown an increased interest in the potty recently and several times over the past 2 weeks we've had to take him out of the tub to sit on it. He will usually tell me when he is poopy too. Yesterday he woke up just one hour into his nap and wouldn't settle back down. He kept telling me "PU" - which is how he tells me he's poopy. I checked his diaper and it was clean. I put him back down to try to get him to sleep a little longer. Fifteen minutes later he still hadn't settled down so I went to check on him and he was poopy. Maybe I'm reading more into things than I should, but I think he was telling me he needed to poop. Now I just have to figure out how to proceed.

On another, cuter note, he is such a good big brother. He frequently wants to hold Scarlett, but tires of her pretty quickly. He has started motioning to her and saying "mine" when he wants to hold her. He sits in his Elmo chair and I put her in his lap. The bad thing is, he hasn't yet learned to tell me he's tired of holding her. Instead he just starts to stand up & says "all done." I've tried to teach him to say "all done" and let me get her BEFORE he stands up, but without success. Of course I'm always keeping a hand on her, so she hasn't fallen yet :) The downside to having to keep a hand on her is that it's really hard to get a good picture of him holding her. I'll keep trying though.

Another cute Matthew story - yesterday he was watching Curious George. When it went off, he asked for "more" and started making his monkey sound, which you can see here.

Scarlett is growing every day. She had been giving me a good 6-7 hours (sometimes 8) hours at night without waking to eat but suddenly started waking up after 4-5 hours. I can't complain because she has always gone immediately back to sleep, but I thought maybe I should try something different. I had been feeding her around 9 or 10 pm and then rousing her to "top her off" before I went to bed at 11 or 12. She would then wake at 4 or 5 to eat. Last night I fed her at 9:10 and instead of waking her when I got ready to go to bed, I just put her down. She slept until 6:15! I'm crossing my fingers that we can do this every night!

nokitty is a little modest

So I guess I have a modest cat. For those of you who don't already know, nokitty is potty trained. He will only use the downstairs bathroom so during the day it is near all our activity. This morning as I was getting breakfast ready, he was running around acting crazy and kind of howling. That is odd behavior for him but I couldn't see anything that seemed wrong. I noticed the bathroom door was wide open, usually the door is only about half-way open. So I went and closed the door part of the way, and sure enough, he went in there and took care of business. I guess he didn't want to poop with the door wide open, and that's ok with me :) I would hate to walk by & see that.

Can you say awwww?

I was getting supper ready tonight while Scarlett sat in the swing and Matthew played with his toys. She started to fuss so I peeked in just in time to see Matthew get off the couch and walk over to her. He started talking to her and playing with her feet, and she quieted down! It was so sweet to see him "tending" to her. I wish I'd had the camera, but it was in the room with them & I know if I had gone to get it I would have ruined the moment.

Drinking age & marriage

I just read an interesting article on a movement to lower the drinking age. I say interesting because it brings up other points besides the normal "if someone is old enough to vote and die for their country" arguments. I don't guess I care too much what the law is, but I've always thought it was silly that 18-20 year olds are deemed mature enough to help elect a president or to go into battle for this great country, but they aren't mature enough to buy their own alcohol. The other points are interesting but I won't go into them here - read the article if you want to know. What I thought was really interesting was the interactive map of the US that was in the article - you could click on any state to see their law. For most states, it says "under 21 may not possess or consume alcohol." That is what I have always thought the law was, mainly because I don't see how you could consume it if you don't possess it. But then some states bar possession and allow consumption...I really don't understand how this is possible. There are some that really strike me as funny though:

In Washington state: Under 21 may consume alcohol if parent or guardian is present. - now this screams crazy to me. First of all, once you're 18 aren't you your own guardian? So legally anyone over 18 can consume alcohol because their guardian would always be present, right?

The winner though, goes to multiple states (and I'm almost ashamed to admit Georgia is one of them): Under 21 may consume alcohol only if married AND if spouse or guardian is present. - now this strikes me as totally ridiculous. Do they think just because someone decides to get married they are responsible enough to decide to drink alcohol? Does getting married automatically make you more mature? I know plenty of married people that are more immature than some single people I know. Maybe if young couples realized this was the law they would get married younger just so they could legally throw one back instead of doing it illegally. I wonder if these states have higher divorce rates than others? Hmmm....

Now this whole thing leads me straight into another train of thought - about marriage. It bugs me that marriage is a legal issue. After I read this article I mentioned the crazy Georgia law to a friend of mine from Pennsylvania. She said there is a big debate in PA now about taxes because single people are taxed at a higher rate. Personally I think marriage is a religious thing and that the government shouldn't care about it at all. I don't understand why we should have to get a marriage license from the county or why it should matter at tax time. A lot of people are probably thinking, but if you're not "legally married" there's no "next of kin" to default in case something happens. My response: SO? I think if someone wants their spouse to be their beneficiary, or wants their spouse to have the right to say what happens to them in a medical situation if they can't say for themselves, then they need to document that with other legal documents, it shouldn't be that way be default because they got a marriage certificate.

Back to the drinking thing - I'm guessing that the law saying "Under 21 may consume alcohol only if married AND if spouse or guardian is present" really means you can drink if you're under 21, married, and your spouse is present OR if you're under 21 and your guardian is present, but the way it's written that's not how it sounds. ??

More pinkeye!

Matthew has pinkeye again. I'm not surprised since he's at an age where he is learning body parts and loves to point at his and ours. It's impossible to keep his hands away from his eyes, and pretty hard to keep them away from ours.

The bad thing is, David has it too! We've all 4 gotten it in the last week, Matthew twice now. I guess I need to follow everyone around with Lysol?

Growing up

Matthew continues to amaze me. He seems to soak up so many things - someone once told me to be a sponge and just absorb as much as I could, sometimes I forget that children are sponges. Last night he did a couple of cute things. First, he put a finger puppet on his hand and waved it around saying "hi". Second, David realized it was an elephant and asked him what sound the elephant makes and Matthew responded by putting his arm to his nose using it like a trunk and kind of roaring. Yesterday he also covered Scarlett with her blanket while she was in the swing and put a cloth diaper above her head, much like I do when she's in the carseat. (I roll a cloth diaper up as extra head support, instead of buying one of the inserts...yeah I'm frugal.) He also can sing "baa baa black sheep" with almost all the words. :)

I was also surprised recently to learn that Matthew understands that the same word can have completely different meanings. I hope he understands "hot" - I know he understands it when I give him food that is too hot, or when his bathwater is too hot, but I'm not sure he understands it in the kitchen when I open the oven and tell him "hot" or outside when we tell him the grill is hot. Speaking of grills, we were at the park and he asked David "what's that?" and pointed to the grill. Now the grills at the park look a good bit different than our grill so it's no surprise he asked. David told him "it's a grill" and he immediately said "hot." So I know he associates hot with grill, I'm just not sure he understands it would HURT if he touched it when it was hot. Anyway, the surprise I started to discuss was that Matthew understands "rock," as in "rock" in a chair, or that it is a stone you find outside or in Mema's flowerpots and you shouldn't put them in your mouth. Maybe I'm too easily impressed?

On another note, Scarlett is smiling - we took some pictures last weekend and noticed when we viewed them on the pc that she was smiling in one. We didn't see it in real life, but Monday she smiled for Matthew when he tried to share his paci and we've seen a few since then. Our camera has a delay between pressing the button & it saving the image so we haven't captured this on film, or rather disk, yet. She also rolled from tummy to back yesterday, but I think it was a fluke. I'm guessing when I put her down I didn't realize her arm was under her, but anyway she rolled. She also slept 8 hours again last night!! Maybe we're getting into a pattern? Can I hope?

I'll try to limit the mommy brags, but let's face it, a good part of my days (and nights) are spent with these two wonderful children. I'm bound to brag on them when they're good, just like I'll complain when they're not.